How we change what others think, feel, believe and do
What Makes A Decision Irrational?
Guest articles > What Makes A Decision Irrational?
by: Sharon Drew Morgen
After spending 30 years deconstructing the inner processes of how people decide, and training a decision facilitation model I developed for use in sales, coaching, and leadership, Iâm always amused when I hear anyone deem a decision âirrationalâ.
Only outsiders wishing for a different outcome designate a decision as âirrationalâ. I doubt if the decision maker says to herself, âGee! I think Iâll make an irrational decision!â I could understand her thinking it irrational after reaping surprising consequences. But not at the moment itâs being made.
We all make the best decisions we can at the moment we make them. Itâs only when someone else compares the decision against their own subjective filters and standard, or using some academic/âacceptedâ standard as ârightâ, or judging the decision against a conclusion they would have preferred, that they deem it âirrationalâ. I always ask, âIrrational according to whoâs standards?â Outsiders donât have the same data set, criteria and beliefs, or life experiences the decision maker uses to evaluate.
Indeed, there is no such thing as a decision maker making an irrational decision. The decision maker carefully â partially unconsciously - weighs an unknowable set of highly subjective factors including
There is no way an outsider can understand whatâs going on within the idiosyncratic world of the decision maker, regardless of academic or ârationalâ standards, the needs of people judging, the outcome as viewed by others.
CASE STUDY OF AN âIRRATIONAL DECISIONâ
I recently made an agreement with a colleague to send me a draft of his article about me before he published it. Next thing I knew, the article was published. How did he decide to go against our agreement? Here was our ensuing dialogue:
BP: I didnât think it was a big deal. It was only a brief article.
SDM: It was a big enough deal for me to ask to read it first. How did you decide to go against our agreement?
BP: Youâre a writer! I didnât have the time you were going to take to go through your editing process!
SDM: How do you know thatâs why I wanted to read it first?
BP: Because you most likely would not like my writing style and want to change it. I just didnât have time for that.
SDM: So you didnât know why I wanted to read it and assumed I wanted to edit it?
BP: Oh. Right. So why did you want to read it?
SDM: My material is sometimes difficult to put into words, and it has taken me decades to learn to say it in ways readers will understand. I would have just sent you some new wording choices where I thought clarity was needed, and discussed it with you.
BP: Oh. I could have done that.
While a simple example, itâs the same in any type of personal decision (vs. those decisions that get weighted against specific academic or group criteria â such as coordinates to drill a well): each decision maker uses her own subjective reasoning regardless of baseline, academic, or conventional Truths. In our situation, my partner wove an internal tale of subjective assumptions that led him to a decision that might have jeopardized our relationship. I thought it was irrational, but âirrationalâ only against my subjective criteria as an outsider with my own specific assumptions and needs.
And, although Iâm calling this a personal decision process, anyone involved in group decision making does the same: enter with personal, unique criteria that supersede the available academic or scientific information the group uses. This is why we end up with resistance or sabotage during implementations.
STOP JUDGING DECISIONS BASED ON OUR OWN NEEDS
What if we stopped assuming that our business partners, our spouses, our prospects were acting irrationally. What if we assume each decision is rational, and got curious: what has to be true for that decision to have been made? If we assume that the person was doing the best they could given their subjective criteria and not being irrational, we could:
Of course, we would have to switch our listening skills. Weâd need to become aware of an incongruence we notice and be willing to communicate with the âirrationalâ decision maker. My new book What? (didihearyou.com) explains why/how we hear others with biased ears, only understanding some percentage oftheir intent. Because if we merely judge others according to our unique listening filters, many important, creative, and collaborative decisions might sound irrational.
Sharon Drew Morgen is the author of 9 books, including NYTimes Business Bestseller Selling with Integrity, and What? Did You Really Say What I Think I Heard? She has developed facilitation material for sales/change management, coaching, and listening. To learn more about her sales, decision making, and change management material, (www.dirtylittlesecretsbook.com) go to www.sharondrewmorgen.com. To learn more about her work on closing the gap between what’s said and what’s heard, go to www.didihearyou.com. Contact Sharon Drew for training, keynotes, or online programs at firstname.lastname@example.org. Sharon Drew is currently designing programs for coaches to Find and Keep the Ideal Client, and Lead Facilitation for Lead Generation.
Contributor: Sharon Drew Morgen
Published here on: 14-Feb-16